Abandon

I’ve had the word abandon on my heart and mind a lot lately, I think, because that is how I have pursued my thesis over the past three weeks: with abandon.
I have committed myself to that process, working on my thesis every day, meeting with my advisor everyday to discuss the latest draft. As Webster’s Pocket Dictionary captures it, I have exercised “unrestrained enthusiasm”

I think there is a lot to be said about the implications of Abandon for how we walk with Christ. Much of the time we hear about surrendering to Christ, which is not what I am talking about here. Surrender is necessary in “giving up” one’s will and heart to Christ, saying “It is not I who live, but Christ who lives within me.” But there is also abandon; that giving oneself over to the pursuit of Christ so that all else fades into the background. I was reminded of this again when I revisited Philippians this morning and read in the third chapter, “But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things.”

And later on, “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers (and sisters), I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal….” Everything else is a loss compared to knowing Christ; all else is forgotten as Paul strains and presses on toward Christ.

What does abandon mean to you?

Wild Flowers

Lately (over the past 3 months) I have been reading some of the books that have been formative in my walk with Christ. One of the first books that I revisited was "Hind's Feet On High Places" by Hannah Hurnard. If you haven't read it yet, I highly recommend it and if you are avoiding reading it, you don't know the blessing that you are missing.

It is a metaphor for the Christian life and the journey deeper into relationship with Christ. I read it for the first time as a senior in high school when Jars of Clay released their album called "Much Afraid" in reference to the song they wrote referencing the main character of the book.

I am just going to share one conversation that goes on between Much-Afraid and the Shepherd as they begin the journey to the high places in chapter 4.

Once the Shepherd stooped and touched the flowers gently with his fingers, then said to Much-Afraid with a smile, "Humble yourself, and you will find that Love is spreading a carpet of flowers beneath your feet."

Much Afraid looked at him earnestly. "I have often wondered about the wild flowers," she said. "It does seem strange that such unnumbered multitudes should bloom in the wild places of the earth where perhaps nobody ever sees them and the goats and the cattle can walk over them and crush them to death. They have so much beauty and sweetness to give and no one on whom to lavish it, nor who will even appreciate it."

The look the Shepherd turned on her was very beautiful. "Nothing my Father and I have made is ever wasted," he said quietly, "and the little wild flowers have a wonderful lesson to teach. They offer themselves so sweetly and confidently and willingly, even if it seems that there is no one to appreciate them. Just as though they sang a joyous little song to themselves, that it is so happy to love, even though one is not loved in return.

"I must tell you a great truth, Much-Afraid, which only a few understand. All the fairest beauties in the human soul, its greatest victories, and its most splendid acheivements are always those which no one else knows anything about, or can only dimly guess at. Every inner response of the human heart to Love and every conquest over self-love is a new flower on the tree of Love.

"Many a quiet, ordinary, and hidden life, unknown to the world, is a veritable garden in which Love's flowers and fruits have come to such perfection that it is a place of delight where the King of Love himself walks and rejoices with his friends. Some of my servants have indeed won great visible victories and are rightly loved and reverenced by other men, but always their greater victories are like the wild flowers, those which no one knows about. Learn this lesson now, down here in the valley, Much-Afraid, when you get to the steep places of the mountains it will comfort you."

Philippians 2:17 - But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.

“There is no spoon”

There’s something about The Matrix that just encourages me every time I watch it. I watched the film again the other day and was reminded of how there is more to this world than what our senses perceive. Also, we, as human beings are more than we appear to be. As Yoda so eloquently put it to Luke Skywalker in Empire Strikes Back, “Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. C.S. Lewis agrees, and says in his essay The Weight of Glory that, “There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal.”

In The Matrix, the people were so distracted with the reality that the machines had constructed that they did not pay any attention to the thought "like a splinter in their mind" that said that something isn’t right. It is the same way in our own world. We are so consumed with the comforts and concerns of this world that we are enslaved to them. We long for a savior but see no relief in sight. Luke Skywalker had the same problem. He saw the condition of his X-wing fighter, and how stuck it was, and upon failing to free the aircraft from the swamp he complained that it was too big, and that Yoda demanded the impossible. And as Luke stomps off to pout, Yoda, focusing on the size of The Force rather than the size of the problem, manages to lift the X-wing completely from its watery prison. Neo also must learn that he must walk the path. He knows that he can free Morpheous but he doesn’t know why or how, he just knows he can. What if we focused on the size of our God, rather than the size of our circumstances?

Too often we humans, image bearers of God, given an immortal soul to live in communion with God or in separation from God, in seeking for the truth often say, “God, give me a sign that you’re real.” Then when he doesn’t deliver we say, “I knew it was all a lie” or “God has abandoned me.” But that isn’t it at all. The truth is that God knows that even if he were to provide some sign the heart that asks for a sign would not be willing to accept it anyway. Much like the Pharisees of Jesus day who watched Jesus heal the lame, restore sight, and free people from demon possession, and after all of this still asked Jesus to provide proof of the authority by which he performed these miracles. We delude ourselves into thinking that as long as we considered the idea of God, we have done all that we can do. Instead, God asks us to surrender to Him, to show Him that we are willing to trust Him and submit to Him, before He will show us His wonders.

God wants us to know Him, and He wants to show us more of Him and who He is but He also wants us to get the full effect which is only accomplished when our hearts are receptive to what He has to show us, not when we are skeptical of His existence to begin with. He wants to show us the world that Neo found, without rules or roads, borders or boundaries, a world where anything is possible…because He is the God of the impossible. But first we must realize the lesson of the spoon; if the world is going to change, the change must begin with me.

Here’s a thought…

The other day I got home from work, sat down with a snack in front of the TV and watched Sportscenter on ESPN. This is a pleasure in which I seldom partake. The topic of discussion was the NFL draft and the impact that each person picked will have on his perspective team. I was pondering this and I realized that we, as a society, are placing so much meaning in this event because it has implications for how well our favorite football team will do in the coming season. For those of you who are in Alabama, think of it as the signing day for college football. These players coming out of high school will have an impact on these teams in the future, for good or bad.

Let’s put this in perspective: it is a game. I know I am committing heresy in the South by reminding people that football is only a game, but it’s the truth and leave it to Northerner to say it. (That’s actually why I care more about NFL than SEC because college football is not all that big a deal in central NY – SU country.) Sure, there is a lot of money at stake and team owners invest a lot of money in a team that will do well, fill the seats and perform well in the playoffs, but the fact remains that it is the players’ JOB to ENTERTAIN us. They may be disappointed if they lose, and we will be disappointed too, but the sun will still rise tomorrow.

What is it in our lives that we place so much meaning in that we forget what is ultimately meaningful, namely God, the Father, the Son and Holy Spirit, and this reality that He/they created. I know that in my line of work in academia there are professors and researchers who hold up their research and their work as ultimately meaningful and wonder why one would ever think their work is boring and don’t you ever refer to me as anything other than Dr. so and so. Maybe we do the same thing in church when we haven’t hit our quota for serving in the nursery, or hosting Bible studies, or however else you are involved in the local church. We find our meaning in what we do rather than who we are.

What if we put all of that aside and clung to what was ultimately meaningful and real? What if we focused on the One we serve and then let how we serve pour out of our love for Him.

I know this sounds a lot like my last post, but I think it is something that is on my heart now because it is getting close to summer (or actually, is summer) and recent summers have been the times when God has drawn me closer, and He’s doing it again this summer. Earlier in the spring I had a data collection job lined up, I wasn’t going to need financial aid; I had my summer pretty well planned. Well, that was shot to pieces and now I won’t have a job so I’ll have a bunch of free time to work on school stuff – unstructured time, which in the past has meant full mornings of just me and God…wonderful times. I know some of you are thinking laaaazzzyyy, but it has been these times of closeness that have sustained me in the storms of the school year, anchoring me to the Rock.

I’ve been reading Hind’s Feet On High Places, by Hannah Hurnard, again, and I just ended chapter 8 that ends with the Great Shepherd saying, “now shalt though see what I will do,” and that’s about where I am. I’ve come to the end of myself in so many places that I have nothing left to do but wait upon Him and see what He will do. I’m excited and anxious. I need to remember to just take it day by day, minute by minute.

Participate!

Back during spring break, the group that I usually worship with on Sunday mornings didn’t meet because it’s with a bunch of college students and it was spring break so not many college students were anticipated to stay in town. So, I took the opportunity to join some of my friends who lead a house church for worship. It was great seeing them again, and singing songs and talking and drinking deeply of The Word.

One idea that we came to in our discussion was that of participating in church and not just sitting on the sidelines and watching others do lead and serve. Well, I was struck with a thought that has been with me since my days in Colorado that God is about relationships and He is constantly in relationship with the Son and Holy Spirit and when we become one of His children we are invited into that relationship, to share the intimacy, to be in Christ, and He in us (John 17:22-23).

I think one of the big reasons we see passive Christianity is because we think that once we are “saved” there’s nothing else. We have the fire insurance, Jesus is my savior, but we don’t treat Him as Lord. We fail to recognize what Jesus also said in his mighty prayer recorded for us in the book of John, chapter 17: “this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom You have sent.”
The Father invites us to relationship…

That reminds me of another passage, more troubling in nature:
Mathew 7:21–23.
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evil doers!”

How else do you learn the Father’s will than by sitting at His feet and learning from Him; by reading His words to us? I just finished reading another blog post. The person’s goal for the summer is to rest in the Lord and seek Him. And there is no higher cause, but there is also no greater target for the enemy, who would rather we spend our time and love on other less worthy objects.

So (to bring this plane in for a landing) my encouragement is to seek first the kingdom, and to learn more about the Father and then seek to serve Him from a heart of love. But there is a world that will remind you of every other thing that you have to do. Be strong. Participate in the relationship to which you are called. You can’t get to know Someone without ever spending time with Him.